The stories we tell

Every day we awaken with a clean sheet of paper, a story waiting to be written. The page is blank, but the mind of the narrator is not.

Yes, today is another opportunity to write a new chapter, but the reality is the stories we have already heard and experienced shape the stories we tell ourselves. The pages that have already been written will impact the words we pen on today’s blank page.

What are the stories you tell yourself?

Most of us, if we are truly honest, have many stories we would rather not share.

Stories of failure.

Stories of being let down.

Stories of abuse.

Stories of betrayal.

Stories of abandonment.

Stories of addiction.

Stories of not being good enough.

These are stories we often bury beneath the surface, cover with facades of happiness, mask with plastic smiles, disguise with humor, and numb with unhealthy behaviors. Stories that fuel anger, shame, and anxiety. Stories that weigh us down and paralyze us, eating away at self-affirmation and the ability to love others. Poison to our souls.

What stories are you telling yourself?

Changing the stories we tell ourselves requires us to stand and face the stories we have been exposed to throughout our lives. We must rumble with the ugly parts of our lives hidden in the basement, inviting them into the light to take away their power.

Once these stories are exposed, we have freedom to write new stories. No longer do we need to fear the basement. Open wounds become scars and past hurts become lessons.

But let’s be honest, this does not elimate the pain; grief will be our constant companion. We grieve words unspoken to those who are gone. We grieve moments that have cut us deeply. We grieve lost opportunities and stolen childhoods. We grieve broken relationships and past mistakes. We grieve ways that others hurt us and we hurt others.

Telling yourself new stories isn’t about ignoring the past, but embracing the past while simultaneously turning the page in the present. Telling yourself new stories means seeing the past in a new light, from a different vantage point. We can be freed from the toxins of the past while never forgetting the lessons learned.

Facing the past leads to a better future. Seek to learn and grow from stories already written. This will not be easy or painless; the journey can be excruciating. The path to healing and growth often leads us through some of the darkest places we have ever been. But remember, only when we have been through the darkness can we most appreciate the light, the light that offers a fresh page and an opporunity to tell yourself a better story.